Hermione did not know how she got to the hospital wing.

Only that she was sitting in a chair, staring at the ground. Around her, the sound of the Weasley’s mourning was present but strangely distant. As if she had a bubble-head charm cast around her.

When she looked at herself, she was startled to see her hands were clean and free of Daphne’s blood. Her clothes were as well. Clean and perfect… as if she had not held her friend as she bled out in her arms.

In her mind, she was still in the corridor when Daphne’s body went limp, her screams echoing off the stone walls but swallowed up by the continued fighting. Her grief appeared to swallow the last of the dark magic running through her, no match for the love and agony that tore through her soul. Then, a shadow fell over her and Blaise was there, mask gone and eyes distant as if his body was in the room but his soul had left minutes before.

“Give her to me,” Blaise said, reaching for the body.

“B-Blaise,” Hermione cried. “She’s…”

He nodded, squatting to scoop Daphne’s thin frame into his arms.

“I know… I know…”

He pressed a kiss to Daphne’s forehead before rising to his full height. Hermione could not help but continue to hold on to Daphne’s hand until the last moment when Blaise had turned and made his way out of the castle.

Snape had come down only seconds later followed by Draco, Theo, and the rest of the Death Eaters from the Astronomy Tower.

“It is finished,” he announced, starting to move towards her out of the corridor.

He, Draco, and Theo stuttered to a stop at the sight of Hermione dripping in blood. Draco’s eyes went wild as he searched her for any sign of injury. She shook her head, tears still flowing down her cheeks.

“It’s not mine,” she said as he got closer. “Daphne…”

Her voice caught on the name, her shoulders beginning to shake. Though Draco reached for her, Snape immediately cut him off.

“Now is not the time nor the place, Draco. We must leave now .” At Draco’s mutinous glance, Snape’s voice dropped into a threatening whisper. “I will imperius you if I must.”

Theo gripped Draco’s arms, his own eyes swimming in tears as he looked down at Hermione, before steering them around her and running out of the castle.

After that her memory became hazy. She knew she’d begun to sob harder, her breath coming in quick gasps until the room began to spin. Her chest felt achy and hollow as she clutched at herself, trying to reach inside and take away whatever this was. Whatever curse had been placed upon her to feel so much.

Now here she was in the hospital wing, mixed in with the Weasleys, Harry, Fleur Tonks, and Lupin.

“Just can’t believe… my boy ,” Mrs. Weasley sobbed into Mr. Weasley’s chest.

Hermione blinked, looking around.

Bill’s face was brutally gouged as if someone with claws had taken a swipe at his flesh. Fleur sat on the mattress next to him, dabbing gently at wounds as tears sparkled on her beautiful face.

Harry shifted beside her, wrapping an arm around Hermione’s shoulder and pulling her close.

“You okay?” he murmured against her hair.

She stiffened for a moment before forcing her body to relax into his arms.

“What’s happened…” she asked, wrapping an arm around his waist and letting him push her hair back from her face. “Who…”

Harry pulled back to look at her and then made eye contact with someone over her head.

“Madam Pomphrey… I think Hermione might need something for shock,” he said gently, rubbing his hand over Hermione’s arm.

Remus looked over at Hermione then, worry clear across his scarred face as he reached to touch the inside of her wrist at her pulse point.

“What’s happened?” she asked again, panic starting to rise.

“You don’t know?” Remus asked slowly.

She shook her head.

“Why are you saying it like that?”

She felt Harry sigh, his hand moving to her back.

“Because we’ve been sitting here for the last hour discussing everything that took place. Merlin’s beard, I should have known when you weren’t saying anything. Fuck ,” Harry swore.

Hermione looked between the two of them, their faces slightly difficult to make out in the dark room with only a single candle flickering on Bill’s bedside to provide a semblance of light. But she didn’t mind – in fact she’d grown to like the dark.

“Bill was attacked by Fenrir Greyback,” Remus said quietly, obviously not wanting to draw too much attention from the Weasleys. Hermione’s eyes widened; she hadn’t even known the werewolf was present. “He wasn’t transformed, thank Merlin,” he added at the look on her face. It was obvious he wasn’t transformed as Remus was still in his human form.

“Charlie was killed by a Death Eater when they came down the stairs,” Harry added, his voice thick with grief. “And… And…”

“Dumbledore is dead,” Remus finished for Harry who was overcome with tears.

Hermione stared at Remus for a long moment, trying to remember that Hermione Granger – best friend of Harry Potter – was supposed to be sad about Dumbledore’s death. She hoped her brief pause could be chalked up to her being in shock as she turned to Harry and pulled him into her arms.

“Oh, Harry. I’m so sorry,” she whispered as her shirt soaked through with his tears.

“It – it was Snape ,” Harry hiccupped, drawing himself away from her to remove his glasses and wipe his face with his shirt sleeve. “I was knocked out but when I came to I saw him standing there surrounded by Death Eaters and… I just knew .”

Hermione reached to catch a stray tear, not bothering to acknowledge Harry’s accusation of Snape. If she was being honest, it did seem like a logical explanation from where Harry stood. So instead she shushed him, trying to soothe him through his pain that did not touch her. It still felt as though the world was a bit removed, a few inches too far away.

Finally he calmed himself enough to wrap an arm around her, as if he needed to assure himself that she had made it out alive.

A wrinkled hand appeared in Hermione’s peripheral vision, extending a small purple phial of potion towards Harry who uncorked it before handing it to her.

“Take this, love,” Harry said.

Her stomach churned at the endearment and the way his bright green eyes shone with concern. But she swallowed the feeling down at the same time as the potion, choking a bit on the overly minty taste.

The removed feeling of only a moment ago vanished. She desperately wished for it to come back. It was suddenly too loud in the wing, the sounds of the Weasley’s grief too sharp as it grated across her skin. The heat from Harry’s body was too hot – almost scalding her.

“Hey, hey – it’s okay,” Harry soothed her, his fiery hands cupping her cheeks. “You’re okay, you’re safe.”

Remus extended another phial to Harry that Pomphrey had handed to him with a muttered “Calming draft” before Harry uncorked it and all but forced Hermione to down it as well.

But even as the potion swirled through her system, deadening her nervous system, her mind still shouted:

You killed Dumbledore.

Daphne is dead.

Draco is gone.

You are alone.